Caitlin Ritter, 25, discovered she was pregnant at seven months with her son Caden, 4. Picture: Tara Croser.

It’s more a common oversight than we think, says Professor Stephen Robson, obstetrician and president of RANZCOG (ranzcog.edu.au), who adds that he has personally seen it quite a few times over the years.

While an irregular menstrual cycle, body weight and a relatively inactive baby can all help disguise the impending arrival, Professor Robson says it’s been his experience that a combination of slow body changes, denial and the polite nature of friends and family not wanting to mention any weight gain, all contribute to the “surprise baby” phenomenon.

“Perhaps the most important thing here is the issue of denial,” he says.

“Humans have a strong capacity for denial in stressful situations and an unplanned pregnancy is about as stressful as they come.”

Having a baby, even when planned, can be a huge adjustment, and not having the time to make proper plans can place huge strains on the mother, he adds. “In such a late stage, women have not had the chance to access quality antenatal care and the screening tests that are so important to good pregnancy outcomes.

“And more than that, they’ve not had the time to organise their work plans, finances, their lives, so this can have its own set of consequences.”

Caitlin Ritter, 25, discovered she was pregnant at seven months with her son Caden, 4. Picture: Tara Croser.Source:News Corp Australia

CAITLIN RITTER

Caitlin Ritter, a 25-year-old content producer, discovered she was pregnant when she was seven months along. Her son Caiden is now four. She says:

“When I look back to my ‘pregnancy’, I guess you could say I behaved like a typical uni student all throughout. I was going out most weekends and getting drunk with my friends, sleeping my way through class and having a few one-night stands. Although I was studying a bachelor of journalism, I didn’t have any clear idea of what I wanted or where I was headed. I figured I had plenty of time to map this out later.

People ask me how I couldn’t have known I was pregnant, but the signs just weren’t there. Like a lot of young women, I was skipping the sugar pills so I wouldn’t get a period, and although I was sleeping and peeing a lot and experiencing heartburn, I only gained one to two extra kilos and my tummy was so flat that the week before I found out I was pregnant, I was at the beach in a bikini with some friends and I didn’t look any different to how I normally look.

I was lying down one evening when I felt a movement which I first passed off as indigestion, but when I looked down at my belly, I saw an external movement — an arm or a leg — push out into my belly like the scene from the movie Alien. That’s when I realised I was pregnant, but it wasn’t until I made the necessary appointments and I heard the baby’s heartbeat that it really hit home. Adding to the surprise? The sonographer announcing the baby was measuring between 28 — 30 weeks, and that ‘there was nothing I could do about it’ — a statement I found to be particularly upsetting.

I was a mess initially and I didn’t know what to do. When I contacted the two potential fathers, the first didn’t want to know anything about it, while the second wanted to use my call as an opportunity to hook up again! Although for the first few days, I’d been thinking seriously about adopting the baby out, I decided then and there that I would keep the baby and we would find a way through.

Realising I had to act quickly, I moved in with my sister who had small children of her own and she and my mother helped out with item such as nursery furniture, prams and baby clothes, while I continued with uni and worked at a cafe until I was 37 weeks along. Being busy helped distract be from worrying so much about the future.

In the end Caiden was born mid-semester and I was able to continue on at uni. I would take him along to tutorials in a carrier and work on my assignments during his 2am wake-up calls. He’s even how I got my current job — while other uni students were writing in to say, ‘I’ve achieved this and that’, I was honest and said, ‘Yes, I’ve achieved this and that too but what’s more, I did it with a baby in tow’ — nothing beats a mother’s time management skills! Yes, there are times where I would say having an unexpected family at such a young age is tough — every morning I’m up at 4.30 to get him ready so I can drop him off at childcare for 6.30 and then travel another hour to get to work each day — but Caiden and I make a great team and I can’t imagine life without him.”

Erica Dilworth with her one-year-old son Oliver, was told she'd never be able to have babies without fertility treatment, yet she discovered she was pregnant at 33 weeks. Picture: Richard DobsonSource:News Corp Australia

ERICA DILWORTH

Erica Dilworth, a 35-year-old team leader for disability services, was told she’d never be able to have babies without fertility treatment. But she discovered she was pregnant at the 33 week mark and is now mum to one-year-old Oliver. She says:

“I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) in my teens and when I was 20, I was told it was it unlikely I’d ever be able to fall pregnant without medical intervention. I was crushed — I’d dreamt of being a mother my whole life and here I was being told it may not be a possibility. When I met my partner John, we decided we would try for a family and that we would aim to start fertility treatment in 2016.

It was with this plan in mind that I went to see a fertility doctor mid last year. I wanted to know what the first steps would be to get started on treatment, but of course after they ran some blood tests, they called me right away and said there was no need to see me again — I was already pregnant! I burst into tears — both with joy and relief. My mother runs antenatal classes at the hospital and she got me in for an ultrasound right away and it was then that they discovered I was 33 weeks and four days along. I cried, I swore, I went blank at times — it was such a huge shock. There was just no outward sign that I was pregnant. I didn’t get any bigger and my periods weren’t that regular anyway.

It sounds crazy to say, but the baby was actually good timing. I had just sold a house that I had co-owned in a previous relationship so I had some money to play with, and it was midyear sale time so I was able to get some great deals on all the baby items. But that doesn’t mean things were easy. I was soon diagnosed with gestational diabetes and my mind was racing from trying to fit a nine-month pregnancy into seven weeks.

When I first had Oliver, I had trouble breastfeeding and social workers insisted I be kept in hospital for mental health reasons because of my late discovery. Although I was confident the best thing for me and Oliver would be to go home, they were concerned I might be having a hard time coming to terms with everything that had happened. Although I hit the ground running when we got home, I ended up being diagnosed with post-natal depression in May and have been steadily working my way out of that ever since. Looking back, it has been a lot to deal with — not only did I suddenly become a mother, but my relationship with John was still fairly new, and we’d moved from living at my parents’ all cramped in the one room together to our own space and it felt like it was all too much for me.

Fortunately I do have good support at home — John has been amazing, as have my parents, but I’m also a member of a wonderful mother’s group which has helped me quite a lot. Yes, it’s been a tough ride at times, but I have Oliver to show for it and no matter how challenging things can be as working mum, I never fail to remember that he’s the miracle I’ve long waited for.”

Shereen Ortell (right), a 35-year-old stay-at-home mum had two surprise pregnancies, with her mother Edna Ortell. Picture: Tim CarrafaSource:News Corp Australia

SHERREN ORTELL

Shereen Ortell, a 35-year-old stay-at-home mum to four-year-old Adrian and three-year-old Jordan, has had two surprise pregnancies. The first time, she found out she was pregnant at 29 weeks, and the second at 25 weeks. She says:

“I guess there were some signs that I was pregnant the first time around — just not the usual ones. When I would have been three months along, I went to the doctor complaining of really sore breasts and they only gave me primrose oil, which I later discovered you shouldn’t have early in your pregnancy. I wasn’t showing or feeling any movement, but I was exhausted, often falling asleep at my desk at work. That’s a sign, I know, but I was working two jobs at the time trying to pay off mounting debts from a large loan and trying to get my partner’s business off the ground, and figured the tiredness was related to that.

I discovered I was pregnant when I went in for a blood test to see why I was feeling so exhausted all the time and to say I was shocked is putting it mildly. Immediately I starting panicking about the situation I was in — not only was I struggling with repaying debts from the loan I’d taken out for my partner in my name, but my partner was violent. At first I told myself I had some time to try to get my life into order but when I had the scan and they told me I was 29 weeks along, I was terrified about how was going to be able to look after the baby.

I reached out to family and friends, and charities such as Red Cross and St Vinnies donated clothing, food hampers, vouchers and a pram, but on the day Jordan was born, I had $10 in my bank account, debt collectors calling me constantly and my repayments were larger than my Centrelink payments. But I soon got pregnant again. Like many I’d believed that since I was breastfeeding, I wouldn’t be able to get pregnant so I was shocked when I discovered I was pregnant and already at the 25 weeks. Again, I’d had no signs — in fact, this time, I was even thinner than before since I’d dropped two dresses from the stress of my situation.

I decided to make the best of the situation and hit the ground running. Life hasn’t been easy since Jordan was born — mum was diagnosed with breast cancer during my second pregnancy, and I’d finally severed all ties with the boys’ father, so it’s been me and them all the way.

I can’t deny things have been tough. Still, things can only get better, and as I tell my family and friends every day, my children saved me and made me a stronger person.”

* If you are trying to raise a surprise baby you can seek assistance from: singlemum.com.au; salvationarmy.org.au; missionaustralia.com.au; thesmithfamily.com.au; parentline.org.au and lifeline.org.au