You build. And you build big.
What was once a quiet corner of the USSR, Ashgabat, Turkmenistan is quiet no more. Golden domes litter the city; imperious statues stand guard at the feet of monuments and marble, white marble, is everywhere.
Guinness World Records lists Ashgabat as reaching these figures in 2013 (the latest available); in the years since it has continued to build.
The men behind the architectural feat do not want you to forget who is responsible.
The face of current president Gurbanguly Berdimuhamedov is ever present, his portrait hanging from many of the buildings he inherited from former leader and self-declared "Turkmenbashi" Saparmurat Niyazov.
Meanwhile Niyazov, who died in 2006, is alive and well in the many golden statues of his likeness. Berdimuhamedov joined the party in 2015 with his own monument, astride a rearing horse atop -- what else? -- a white marble cliff.
The current president has found other ways to stamp his authority on the city. In 2010 he moved the Neutrality Arch -- one of Ashgabat's biggest monuments, complete with a statue of Niyazov which rotated with the sun -- to the outskirts of the city.
Some have argued that these buildings are little more than vanity projects for both presidents, Ashgabat picking up a host of obscure records during its construction frenzy: the largest enclosed Ferris wheel; the largest architectural star; and the most fountain pools in a public place.
These were verified in person by Guinness World Records, but by and large Turkmenistan is a reclusive state, both difficult to enter and, if you're a citizen, not always easy to leave.
Ashgabat may be a presidential playground but it surely ranks as one of the great architectural curiosities of the world.
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